"My Van Has White Coat Syndrome" published

This article was published in Your Country Neighbor, Jan. 2020: 

My Van Has White Coat Syndrome 

© 2019 by Janet Sobczyk, 

It’s a common complaint. You’ve been feeling sick or something hurts, but by the time you actually get to a doctor, you feel better. That’s called White Coat Syndrome (WCS). Actually, doctors use that term more specifically for elevated blood pressure while in the doctor’s office. But the first definition is the one most other people think it means.

People are the most prone to WCS, but I’ve seen pets have it too. Fido might seem on his last legs at home, but as soon as you pull up to the vet clinic, he hops right out and trots in like, “Look at me. I’m fine.”

My van now has it. I’m not kidding! The other day it started making a horrible sound all the way home from work. For 30 minutes it rattled so loud I thought a front tire was going to fall off. Except the sound wasn’t coming from the wheel area. And it made a metallic “ding, ding” sound like a chain swinging and hitting metal. I made an appointment with the mechanic for the next morning and prayed I’d make it there intact.

You guessed it.The next morning the big sound was gone. And the ding-ding, too. But I took it in anyway and described what had happened. An hour later they ended my waiting-room misery (whoever chose CNN for that TV was sadistic!) and told me they’d found nothing wrong. Of course!

Then the mechanic reassured me that old vehicles do have a lot of rattles. Well, I guess a 16-year-old vehicle does qualify as old. Maybe I was over-reacting. And then he told me that next time they would need more detail, like at what speed does it make the sound? Or when you turn in which direction? Really, it just made the awful, death-sounds the whole way home. But that was yesterday, and today it seemed just fine. Good! I had errands to run.

The van ran perfectly (with only its usual rattles) all the rest of that day. But the next day, yep! The noises returned, complete with ding-dings. Maybe I’ll have to call a driveway mechanic who can sneak up on the van and check it out before it knows what’s happening.

Image from Creative Commons:  capthttps://live.staticflickr.com/3108/2658510318_8421f09541_m.jpgion

"The Year Christmas Came Before Advent" Published

This article appeared in the December 2019 issue of "Your Country Neighbor."

The Year Christmas Came Before Advent

by Janet Sobczyk, 2019

(This photo of our Advent wreath wasn't submitted with the article.)

Recently I was perusing the holiday section of a children’s library and noticed there are so many picture books about some character or another saving Christmas. The message seems to be that humans (and animal characters, too) will go to great lengths to make sure Santa comes. The last illustration usually shows the character who did the saving, surrounded by smiling loved ones. 

That is the real message. Christmas is saved when people can be with their loved ones. Preserving traditions around important holidays keeps families bonded together. But what happens when family members can’t make it home for the holiday? Often times the answer is to move the date. With tight work schedules and travel from long distances many families opt to celebrate a holiday on the weekend before or after the actual date. And that’s perfectly fine. 

When my siblings and I grew up we all settled in different states: Nebraska, Iowa, Minnesota, and Colorado. My brother who is now in Colorado was in the Air Force, so his state changed several times through the years. 

In the early years we still managed (or attempted) to get together for Christmas with my parents. I remember one of the last years we all gathered at their house, bad weather was an issue. Everyone from close states made it, but my sister from MN had to find a motel for refuge from the storm. 

Mom was so upset with the worry of everyone arriving safely that she couldn’t enjoy Christmas Eve at all. “We can’t start anything until she gets here” was her refrain as we tried to come up with things to do that evening. So, at the risk of one daughter missing out on a fun moment, the rest of us had a boring time. We did thoroughly enjoy Christmas Day together when she arrived the next morning. But the lesson I learned was to expect that these things can happen and just enjoy being with the ones who can be there. 

So now my own children are grown and some of them have to travel to get home for Christmas. I understand the worry of my mother better now. When the weather is bad, I’m inclined to say, “Stay put and enjoy whatever you can make of it, wherever you are. We can be together another day. It’s not worth risking lives.” 

Although weather can always be a factor, another issue that faces young married couples is finding ways to be with both sides of the family. That’s especially hard when the parents and the in-laws live in different states. It’s only fair to alternate, so that’s why three of our five children will not be home for Christmas this year. That’s okay. We just moved our celebration to another date. What’s important is that we can be together, right? Well, the only time that works for all of us this year is…. Thanksgiving weekend. 

We’ll have the big turkey dinner Thursday, shop and put up the tree on Black Friday, then have a ham dinner and presents on Saturday. It’s a perfectly logical plan, and I’m sure we’ll have a great time. But it strikes me as odd that we’ll be done with Christmas before the first day of Advent. 

By the time this December issue of Your Country Neighbor comes out, we’ll be done. As everybody else endures the crazy Christmas rush, we’ll be done. As people are busy wrapping gifts, ours have already been opened. 

Hearing Christmas carols throughout December might feel like hearing them in January. Enough already! Or maybe I’ll feel the way a friend predicted, “Just think. You’ll have time to sit back and enjoy the music and lights.” And the nativity set, with everything it symbolizes: family, faith, hope of salvation. Add some eggnog and Christmas movies and we’re good! 

"From Grief to Acceptance to Hope" Published

    My daughter's birth story has been published in this wonderful book by  Kat Crawford.

Buckets of Hope is about recovering from different types of losses and contains the inspirational stories of 26 writers, as well as Kat's own remarkable story of grief and recovery.

"From Grief to Acceptance to Hope" is my narrative about recovering from the shock and sense of loss at the birth of my youngest daughter (with special needs) to begin a wonderful journey of hope. 

Thank you, Kat, for inviting me to join your compilation project! 

It's available on Amazon for $10.99 paperback or $2.99 Kindle here:

Buckets of Hope

"The Prank" Poem Published

This poem was published in the November 2019 issue of "Your Country Neighbor."

The Prank

by Janet Sobczyk, 2019

Plant a fragile sapling 

dig, settle in the dirt 

fill in, shore up 

enjoy over long seasons 

notice it growing 

unfolding into the sky 

delayed gratification at its finest. 

Plant a plastic skeleton 

dig, settle in the dirt 

build joists, lay the deck 

enjoy impossible anticipation 

for next homeowner to uncover 

maybe, someday 

delayed gratification most painful. 

Won’t it become Poe’s telltale heart 

lying under the deck 

rasping a dry call to be found? 

Won’t the prankster pry up one board 

show someone, anyone, everyone 

for a shocked look, appreciative chuckle? 

How could he not?

The inspiration for this poem was a Facebook post by “Dad Joke of the Day”: “Redoing the deck, so I went to Party City and purchased a skeleton. Now in 20 years when the new homeowner needs to redo the deck……” The picture showed a realistic-looking, plastic skeleton half-buried in the dirt under the joists of the new deck in mid-construction. Creepy!

"Small Town Mansions" Poem Published

This poem with my 3 photos was published in the October 2019 issue of "Your Country Neighbor." A weekend anniversary trip inspired this poem. The time away was lovely, and museums entertained, but the historic mansions captured my imagination.

Small Town Mansions

by Janet Sobczyk, 2019

I’m not a good traveler 

bulging bags are a drag 

long drives don’t appeal 

crammed itineraries exhaust. 

I prefer quick, nearby trips 

a small town stay 

two hours away… 

perfect! 

Quaint museums, small cafes, 

renovated B&Bs with shady porches, 

photo opps, historic stops 

and quiet time to read are what I need. 

A stroll down this town’s Mansion Mile 

reveals treasures bold 

where stories and glories unfold 

and time travel seems possible. 

Imagine living here in the 1800s 

as rich folk with servants and gardeners 

long dresses, hats, starched shirts, spats 

horses and carriages on cobblestone streets. 

Imagine living here now 

as middle class folk with money woes 

trying to maintain a money pit 

in a town with a hard-hit economy. 

The glorious chateau 

sits next to a burned-out bungalow 

that may get revived 

or remain a dive. 

Time ravages all 

some mansions crumble and fall 

others get rebuilt next to weeds and silt 

a mismatched neighborhood.

"A Labor of Love" Published

The article and photo appeared in the September 2019 issue of "Your Country Neighbor."

A Labor of Love

by Janet Sobczyk, 2019

This summer I moved a library. 

I didn’t move near a library. I literally moved a small school’s library from one room to another down the hall. Actually, students helped pack the books into boxes last May. Then they stacked them in the lobby. 

In July I began sorting them out because the new space is smaller than the old library space was. I weeded out duplicates and old books that hadn’t been checked out in years. I looked at every book card to make sure so I wouldn’t get rid of a well-worn favorite by mistake. 

The second day into the project someone asked for donations for an organization that ships thin, paperback books to a school in Uganda. They received five large boxes; it felt great to see them put to good use. 

The rest of the weeded-out books were boxed for a charitable organization here in Omaha, then we loaded them into two school vans. I drove one of the vans myself and acted like a mother hen as they were unloaded. I love books, and needed reassurance they would make their way into children’s hands from there.

The huge pile of books to keep I had already loaded onto the shelves as fast as I could. The goal of getting the lobby cleared out by the start of school had been a palpable weight on my shoulders, but the mission was accomplished. Organizing the books in ABC and Dewey order will still take some time, but it’s looking like a library already.

I know the administration appreciated all my work. However, when my daughter (a student at the school) walked in and immediately found items she wanted to check out, that was all the thanks I needed.

"The BSB" Published

This article appeared in the August 2019 issue of "Your Country Neighbor."

The BSB 

Janet Sobczyk, 2019 

It happens every year at this time.

One week I’m enjoying the laid-back, less-busy days of July, and the next I walk into a Back to School sign at the grocery store. Literally! I’m clumsy.

That first jolt doesn’t sit well. I know some parents are more than ready for school to begin. But my insides churn at the thought of all the summer things I haven’t done yet. Sure, I’ve stayed up later and slept in sometimes. I’ve enjoyed walks, tended flowers, and slurped ice cream cones. But what about my list?

I start every summer with a long list of want-to-do’s. The list includes recreation ideas and projects around the house. A quick look now shows very little accomplished. Time to go into summer overdrive.

First, I schedule a gathering with relatives, and a trip to visit my sister. Next, schedule the school physical and eye exam. Then prioritize the projects. Painting, cleaning, organizing. I’ll clear out the garage on the next cool day. Sort old photos on a beastly hot day. Okay, the huge pile of pictures might not get done. Winter’s a good time for that, or next summer. I’m good at procrastinating.

Time to make another list. A long shopping list of back to school supplies and clothes for a growing daughter. I dread starting this because it can be an expensive outing, and it signifies to me the end of summer. Yes, there will still be plenty of hot weather through September, but when school starts in mid-August, it’s all over.

I dread making that list, but I actually enjoy getting it done. At home I label and help pack each item into the backpack, double-checking the list. There’s something about new school supplies that makes me feel like anything is possible. It’s a fresh start that’s better than New Year’s Day.

The backpack then sits and waits patiently to be called into action. It’s last year’s model, but should make it through another year. When new, it sat up straight and ready to go. Now it slouches, and a pocket is torn, but it’ll hang nicely on my daughter’s back for the annual, first-day-of-school photo on the front porch. Smile!

By now I’m smiling at the thought of it all. The routines. The activities and events. Seeing kids and parents I haven’t seen all summer. It will be a good year.

Yep! I’ve caught it. The Back to School Bug!